10 years prior today, you fell in love with life and all things that came with it, the people, the challenges, all that it can offer, but you tried so much to fit in just to get acceptance and be loved, while you really just wanted to be respected, not knowing that respect vary in different degrees and circumstances and that respect and fitting in are two different things. While you wanted to be accepted before, now a days you rarely give a fuss over things, you don’t owe them your attention anyway, and they need to let you be.
Before You are naive thinking that after life hands you suffering that somehow it will pity you and give you good things, while you fail to see that it has given you set of skills to surpass those sufferings. You have waited for a hero to save you, and prayed for deliverance, you cried in the morning and you weep at night, but no one is there aside from that still small voice, no one physically saved you, but you became your own hero, strengthened by the one who made you.
10 years prior today you idealized too much, well yeah, nothing has changed much in that department, but you must admit you are the worst before, and your idealism has cost you so much pain. You idealize your parents and their marriage that you lost your trust when they separated and you realized that no matter how people loved each other, they can hate and hurt each other as well.
You idealized yourself as well, having that moral and self righteous thinking all the time, until you have to face yourself in the mirror and see your own frailty as a human and that you can’t always be the person people needs you to be, also that no matter how good a person you may seem, you have your own dark side. but it’s okay you are not perfect!, your individuality developed when you come to accept the real you, your own weaknesses and strengths.
10 years prior today you’ve made a mistake that until now you regret having. Your mistake is not falling for someone who couldn’t be yours but to think that, that person fell for you too, you know that you brought it to yourself and now you are still grieving over it, but let not your mistake define you and stop you from loving again, you already invested on loving yourself and building your blocks of standards, you know you are best in judging characters now.
You should set yourself free from the torments of yesterday. Yes Remember them all, cry if you may, but remember that the reason you’re writing this to is because that person of 10 years ago, is a lonely girl with issues of codependency and you are a self made satisfied strong woman now, capable of being you, capable of accepting things, circumstances and people as they are, you are not that girl anymore and it’s a good thing !